How Can I Repay the Grace of God and the Love of the Shepherd Who Welcomed the Prodigal Son
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 15062 |
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September 19, 2010 |
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Brother Taekon Oh (2 Young Adults' Mission)
Together with a good brother, Hyunkwan Moon, whom God sent to me as a good partner for the blessing of good sales results
I was born into a very poor family as an unwanted boy, so during my childhood I went through many kinds of difficulties. While growing in a dysfunctional family, I sought destructive and violent things even prior to entering the elementary school. As soon as I entered the elementary school, I became notorious for my harassment against many others.
Meanwhile, my mother, my sister and I were guided to Manmin Central Church. But because I didn't lead a proper life in faith, I began smoking in the 4th grade of the elementary school and often I left home. I stole money and was involved in unlawful and illegal behaviors. My parents divorced and I dropped out of middle school. At 19 I had no one and nothing to rely on, and I was exhausted so that I came to the church. I was so happy at everything in the church and prayed. But I had just a little fundamental knowledge of Christianity, and I had to feel pains because I was reminded of the things I had already repented. Whenever I was reminded of so many sins I had committed, I thought my conscience had been seared as with a branding iron and doubted whether there might be a chance for my salvation in my case. Finally I fell into deep pains in the midst of Satan's accusations.
I didn't realize the love of God who in His Word promises that when we repent of and turn back from the sins we have committed He forgives us as written saying, "As far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us…" and "…their sins and their lawless deeds I will remember no more". I lost strength and fell into anxiety and fear. Sometimes in the middle of taking a shower, I was possessed with fear and fainted and fell. I tried to have relationships with girlfriends to soothe my discomforted heart. I left the church and entered military service and almost lost my life a couple of times. After the completion of the military service, I entered into running an accessory shop but completely failed in that business. All that remained with me was a great amount of debt.
After that I rented a one-room house near the church and worked at a local PC Room as a part-time worker. And I began searching for a job. From the October of 2009, I could sometimes attend church and listened to the messages on Hell by Senior Pastor Dr. Jaerock Lee. At first I couldn't listen to the messages because of fear but instead slept during the service. But as time passed I came to think about many things.
'What could I become if I'd lead this kind of wretched life?' At first I didn't pay attention to Sunday morning service, but later I came to attend Sunday evening service and the group fellowship meeting. On November 2, 2009, a desire came over me to go to the church. The moment I was seated at a pew in the sanctuary to attend Daniel Prayer Meeting a lot of tears welled up in me and I felt inclined to hide myself in great shame. The time for me to go to my part-time job was drawing nearer but I just stayed there.
The next night and the next night I attended Daniel Prayer Meeting, and simply said to God in prayer, "I am sorry! I've come before You! Forgive me" and wept so much and then returned home. A few days later I earnestly clung to God in prayer, saying, "Help me! God! I've done wrong. I'm wickeder than Judas Iscariot. Forgive me! I don't want to go to Hell. Save me! God! Please give me one more chance! I'll never disappoint You again!" God gave me the grace and helped me repent of my sins with tears and sincere heart. And I could immediately cut off the worldly things including drinking, smoking and girls and all the things that I had loved so long.
I looked back at my past days with a resolute heart and thoroughly repented of my wrongdoings, and then sent a repentance letter to Senior Pastor asking him to intercede for me. Later I received the prayer from him with sincere heart and an offering. God's mercy and grace came upon me. I reinstalled my computer with a firewall to prevent any kind of pornographic materials available on the Internet from breaking in. Then, such a desire to watch those obscene materials disappeared completely, and since then I've never seen such things again.
After the problem of my sins was resolved, my heart was so joyous and happy. I really wanted to repay for the many sins I had committed. So, I sought and did whatever good things I was able to do and rendered as many services for the church as I was able. I did so only with the wish to store goodness in the sight of God. In December of last year, I was chosen as the secretary of my 10-member group in the 2nd Young Adults' Mission.
Young Adults' Mission offered the 2010 devotional service in last May. Because it was the first time for me to understand the significance of the devotional service and dedicating myself to the Lord, it imparted a special meaning to me. I offered God 3-day fasting prayer 3 times, and thoroughly examined my past life and encouraged my faith myself. I prepared for a special offering for the devotional service with all my heart and strength, and participated in the dancing team at the devotional service. I was working at a bank as a lobby manager and my monthly salary was 1,200,000 Won (approximately 1,000 USD). My credit card debt was so big because I had lived such a loose life in intemperance, but I was giving two-tenths of my income repenting of not having paid the whole tithe.
In June, I entered the Seoul Joong-Ang Insurance Company and started a job as an insurance planner. Two months later something surprising occurred to me. Senior Pastor Dr. Jaerock Lee, in the middle of his sermon series 'The Lecture on the Book of Genesis,' gave a 4-session lecture 'The Seed of Life' and told church members to listen to the audio tapes of the 4-session series sermon more than 10 times. When I obeyed and repeatedly listened to the sermons 10 times, I won the 3rd place at the sales result of our company at that month. And I could make many contracts with clients introducing various insurance products—at the cost of 300,000 won, 500,000 won, and 1,000,000 won.
I read at least one chapter of the Bible and memorize one verse every day and listen to and reviewed the 3 weekly sermons once again. This past August I was one of the two co-winners of the first place. Because I won the first place in August when many people took vacations, I confessed it was made possible only by the grace of God and the unfailing love of the shepherd for the prodigal son. I give all thanks and glory to the Lord Jesus Christ and God who held me in His arms and guided me, who had no delight and no light of hope in the journey of life.
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