How Great Is the Grace of the Lord who Loved Such a Person as Me!
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May 02, 2010 |
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 Sister Eunjung Hwang (4th Young Adults' Mission)
"It was so shocking to me to hear a young man suddenly died at the traffic accident. 'We may meet with death. Then all that will be awaiting me is hell.' I became really clear-minded! "
In 1999, when I was 9 years old, I began to attend Yeosu Manmin Church along with my friends. The life in the church was so interesting to me that I loved telling my mother and friends the bible stories, saying, "Do you know why Jesus was hung on the cross and died? It's because of our sins."
My Wandering Began at 20
During my puberty, I was shaken in my faith. While I was attending church, I had doubt in my mind. I thought, "Adults have all kinds of experiences, so they can throw them away easily without any lingering desire. God! If I fall into a deep mire of wandering, please take me out of there and lead me to the right way." My foolish and stupid thoughts began to be revealed into actions at 20. As a saying goes, "Many a little makes a mickle," I followed the earthly flow and befriended the world, but hesitated to attend the fellowship in Christ.
Shortly after the graduation from the high school, I got a job and became imbued with the sense of freedom as an adult. And I began to think what I really desired to be, and continually moved into a new company, and at the same time endeavored to cultivate myself attending English school, cultural center, dance school, and so on. I was distanced from the church and my heart became filled with worldly honors, desire for wealth, and earthly pleasure.
I Suffered from Chill and Menstrual Periods
From my childhood I had felt so chilly and trembled that even in summer I had to switch on the electric pad and cover my body with winter blanket. In winter I had to use twofold blankets and switch on electric pad at the highest level. That serious chill caused me to suffer from piercing headache.
One summer night, my family and I went out to the Han River, but I felt too chilly and trembled too much as if I had been drowned into water in cold winter. We had to leave there in 5 minutes. When I took off my padding jumper and went to office in May, my fellow workers welcomed me clapping hands.
They encouraged me saying, "How about taking herbal medicines?" or "I'd recovered after I ate ginseng and red ginseng for one and half a years." Despite many kinds of recommendations, I didn't put any of them into action because I was worried of aftereffects. To make matters worse, menstrual period was very serious. Because of that serious pain, I sometimes couldn't go out of the office but just cried loudly or fainted out. It was often troublesome to fellow workers and seniors in the office. But I never thought of going to hospital. I just tried to ignore that pain because the pain from menstrual periods and chilly pain are different depending on each person.
Wandering between the Church and the World
In 2004, when I was 23 years old, I went worse and my family was afraid to advise me to turn back and follow the right way. I was not only wandering in faith but in poor condition in body as well. I was really exhausted. I often said to myself, 'Eunjung, no more! Be on the alert and renew your believing life!" because I had the knowledge of the Word of God. But I didn't put my resolution into action.
One day in 2008, I heard that a man of the same Young Adults' Mission had met with a traffic accident and died on the spot. It was so shocking news to me. 'Death really happens to us! If I die right now, the destination is hell' thought I. After that I was afraid of death, and even while crossing the street I had to look around for fear of death.
When I came to think I might die in that spiritual mire, my mind was really converted. And I tried my best to change my life. But it was not easy to pray without ceasing, and to cut off the former manners of life and worldly pleasures. Time continued passing with my foot in the church and the other in the world.
God! Forgive Me!
My mother is Pastor Boksim Kim serving at Manmin Central Church, and my father is Deacon Myungsoo Hwang, a trailer driver doing transporting business. My father has been transporting Muan Water from Muan to Seoul for the last a dozen of years. During my wandering, mother didn't rebuke or point out to me but instead earnestly prayed the Holy Spirit might move my heart. This prayer of her love finally brought me a chance of my change.
For a year I made all efforts to recover the first love for the Lord. I offered the worship services with all my heart, had the fellowship of faith with brothers and sisters in Christ, and prayed fervently at Daniel Prayer Meeting. Recovering a proper believing life cost me a lot of labor and efforts.
On November 2, 2009, when the Two Consecutive Daniel Prayer Meetings began, I came to repent of my past life and sins with tears and runny nose. I shed a lot of tears and sincerely cried to God in prayer, "God! Forgive me my foolish life! From now on I will love only the Lord." I was so sorry for the last time I had wasted. If I find brothers and sisters who are in the similar shoes of mine, I'd like to tell them, "It's not too late. Please renew your spiritual strength. Everything on earth is vanity!"
With my change, not only my family but also my guidance teacher and mission members rejoiced greatly. I felt sorry to Senior Pastor Dr. Jaerock Lee more than to anyone else. But when I think how happy he would be to see I had come out of darkness and now is shining bright lights through his patient prayer and love, I am always comforted.
I am so happy like walking on a cloud
On December 13, 2009 my family and I came to Senior Pastor to greet him. I requested him to pray for me with two prayer titles: the healing of severe chill and menstrual periods. Reading my prayer requests, he said to me, "It's proper to feel cold in cold winter and feel hot in hot summer" and prayed for me. That night I believed that I had been healed by his prayer, and took off very thick coat and instead put on light clothes and went out. I felt no chilly anymore. When I ran up, I felt I was sweating~!
I used to wear a padding jumper even in May before, but I walked around in light clothes taking off the jumper in the cold winter, and the people around me were so surprised. In addition, my menstrual periods were recovered and I have not taken menstrual leave for 3 months. All these changes were made possible because God saw my little efforts to live by His word and gave me His grace and love enough to practice His word. How great His grace is toward me who is nothing!
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